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 Post subject: Hints or Coincidences?
PostPosted: June 3rd, 2004, 3:11 pm 
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Joined: October 29th, 2003, 1:44 pm
Posts: 36
Location: Derry, NH
Hi everyone,
I was glad to find this forum, as I am struggling right now with the loss of someone I loved very much. I miss her, and think of her every day.

Part of me feels like she is so very far away from me... in a place I can't reach. I don't feel as though she is with me at all, and this adds salt to an already open wound.

Strangely though, I do seem to get almost daily "hints" that she's still with me in some way. For example, seeing red (her favorite color in unexpected places), hearing her first name unexpectedly (it was Helen) or her last name, gifts or cards she gave me popping up unexpectedly where I can't miss them, or having humorous incidents happen (I was nearly swallowed by the new earth of her grave the first time I went to visit, distracting me from my sadness in a way she would have found highly amusing).

I guess my question is, am I reading too much into these things? Is the pain at her loss making me see things that I want to see? Could she really be with me if I can't feel her? I know if it were possible, she would watch over me.

Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Sue

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 Post subject: Coincidence
PostPosted: June 3rd, 2004, 4:59 pm 
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Joined: April 29th, 2004, 8:49 pm
Posts: 3632
Location: God's country
I think you are SEEING what you are suppose to see. You just think you SHOULD BE seeing something ELSE. While you aren't "feeling" her, you are seeing various aspects to your relationship. We have a preconceived idea of what "response" is suppose to be from the other side and often we are surprised to find it to be different than what we were looking for. One person may be waiting for some "cold air spot" to hit but instead gets repetitive dreams. Others are waiting for dreams but are getting coincidences. Opening awareness lets us receive however/whenever.


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PostPosted: June 3rd, 2004, 5:35 pm 
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Joined: October 29th, 2003, 1:44 pm
Posts: 36
Location: Derry, NH
So maybe that's it — just not what I was looking for. She is most assuredly a part of me, it's so hard not to see her every day. I wish I could hug her, but now that's not possible. So instead I send my love, and wish she was here.
S


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PostPosted: June 4th, 2004, 3:13 am 
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Joined: June 3rd, 2004, 2:49 am
Posts: 2
Hello Sue,
Yes!! I think Helen is there, your own special 'guardian angel'..your special power and protector. Helen has more power where she is now than she ever did on earth. She is free of the body that kept her back. The signs you see are not just your imagination. You are just more in tune to them. RED!! how glorious! What comfort. Helen is just trying to communicate with you and she can't do it in the way she could before. So...her name, her color...all of that. she is definitely speaking to you.

I am no expert. My own precious daughter died last November, almost 22 years old. My only child. I am SUCH a skeptic... i believe in NOTHING (almost) Yet I see things now that I cannot deny. It is mixed with a feeling and it is that feeling that makes it so powerful, that makes me unable to deny that she is there...I truly do not think i am imagining it either...I am just more aware, ready and open. That makes all the difference, I think, Sue...

My thinking is that when you feel her further away from you??? She may be concentrating on helping someone else that is really needing it. Helen sounds very special and giving and loving. So, let her go to others...she will never stay from you for long. i wish you peace as you try to move on with your heavy heart.
Much love to you, (SORRY SO LONG!!! got carried away....)
Elizabeth


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PostPosted: June 4th, 2004, 12:24 pm 
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Joined: October 29th, 2003, 1:44 pm
Posts: 36
Location: Derry, NH
Hello Elizabeth,
My heart goes out to you, losing a child must be the worst pain in the world. I can't even imagine whta you must be going through, and I'm glad you feel that your daughter is still iwth you. I believe she is, and I'm a skeptic too.

It's true, my godmother Helen was loved by so many, and there are others who need her so much more than I do. Her sisters, who are struggling to keep thier relationship alive without her, her rat bastard of a husband who is old and alone (and deservedly so, believe me) and her lifelong friends who miss her terribly.

It's odd that you say she has so much more power now than she did in life. She was admittedly "a scaredy cat" who went out of her way to avoid confrontation. I'm the same way, and it's one of the things we shared. It's comforting to think of her as having power and peace now, things she never had in life.

Sorry, now I'm rambling, and I just really wanted to thank you for your thoughts, and for sharing your story with me. It helps.
S

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PostPosted: June 5th, 2004, 11:15 am 
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Joined: August 1st, 2003, 9:52 am
Posts: 1874
Hi S.,

Unfortunately, we're raised to be more analytical then I believe we were ever intended to be. You asked if you're reading too much into situations. I, and probably everybody else here, when looking at the list you included in your initial post, and thinking...that is WAY too many coincidences for Helen not to be reaching out to you.

Wow, you are so blessed and I'm so happy for you that you're able to recognize her communication with you. It's hard to communicate "through the veil" (I hate to use analogies, but sometimes there just no better way to say what we're trying to say). I liken it to two people trying to have a conversation in adjacent rooms...but they both speak different languages, and one of them is blind, can't hear. The other person must find some way to make contact, and you really have to admire spirits' creativity when they do this! There really is only one way to send messages...and that's through signs.
I bet they have a lot of fun doing that and I know they are thrilled when we're able to recognize some of the signs they're sending our way.

Hugs!
Angela


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PostPosted: June 7th, 2004, 2:48 pm 
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Joined: October 29th, 2003, 1:44 pm
Posts: 36
Location: Derry, NH
Wow Angela that's a great analogy — I see precisely what you mean.

I always tend to doubt myself… though I've had experiences in my life that cannot be explained any other way. I think in my Aunt Helen's case, the loss is still so fresh, so raw, and so hurtful that it was hard to see past all that.

When I look back now at the list of hints (and there were probably one or two I forgot) it seems so obvious, but it wasn't. I guess sometimes we need to put it in black-and-white to see it. That is really analytical, isn't it?

Thanks to all for your kind words and sharing your thoughts. It is comforting to see signs, expected or not, from those we've loved and lost to the other side.
S


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 Post subject: One more "coincidence"
PostPosted: July 12th, 2004, 12:42 pm 
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Joined: October 29th, 2003, 1:44 pm
Posts: 36
Location: Derry, NH
Hi All,
Just wanted to give you an update… something that happened on vacation last week.

We left on my godmother's b-day, July 3rd for a week up at the Lake she loved so well. We have done this for almost six years now, my family, my mom and dad, and my brother's family.

After we arrived, we met a lovely family from Darien, CT, who had stayed at these same cottages for five years now. We've been for the last three in a row. We'd met before, but I can't remember this. Certainly it was only in passing, several years before.

Anyway, this year, my oldest daughter met (on the first day) and became fast friends with their oldest girl, "coincidentally" named… HELEN.

She was a sweet, charming girl, the whole family were wonderful, educated people who made our week (in a place my godmother loved with all her heart) fun and special. Of course, my godmother was much in my thoughts, and this lovely young girl who shared her name was a comforting reminder that she is indeed, with us still.

Just had to share,
Sue


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: December 27th, 2004, 7:53 pm 
Hello everyone,

I personally believe that if you perceive them to be messages, then they are messages.

This past November, my father passed away. While he was laying in the hospital bed, he looked as though he wanted to say something. I hate that I he couldn't say what he wanted to, so that image of him haunts me daily. While I looked at him, I told him not to worry because anything he wants to say or share, he can give to me and my mother while we all are sleeping. I told him that we will hear him.

I wasn't sure if what I was saying was possible, but I thought, at the very least, it may perhaps ease his struggle.

Well in the past few days, I've had dreams of him. He was perfectly healthy and going about business as usually. No word were spoken, but I had the sense that things were okay.

He'd been worried about what he'd encounter after death.

So I perceive this to be a message. Whether it is or isn't, I know it was him in a sense.

So as to Helen and the red things, people's names. I really beleive those are messages.

You are blessed.

That's just my opinion anyway.

Dev


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PostPosted: December 28th, 2004, 4:32 am 
I'm not sure if Elizabeth has been back to this forum since posting but I just wanted to offer my condolences to your daughter passing.

My daughter died 12 years ago and I had a feeling she was going to die before she did , call it mother instinct.

Also my mother passed away three years ago. I had spent the biggest part of my life caring for her. I was with her during the last moments of her death and I believe it was my blessing she was waiting for.


Since my mothers passing I have been constantly reminder of her. I thought maybe it was just me still not letting go.

But the story I wanted to share is one I have written on my site and I'll share it in short here.



Last year we asked a lady for directions for a street we were looking for and she ended up driving us to the street. While in the van She turns to my husband and said” I know you"," You put together my sons bike many years ago when you worked in a bike shop and I still have that bike”. My husband shocked asked, “You remember that long ago ”. She had remembered.

My daughter asked her how old her son was and she told us 28, but he died the same year they bought the bike.


My husband told her we too had lost a child and she had remember when that happen . She remember reading all about it in our papers and what we went through.

So running into this woman was very strange or maybe it was just our children communicating with us.

Either way we shared a bond.


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PostPosted: January 1st, 2005, 12:47 am 
Rose,

I am very sorry to hear about your loss. I sometimes wonder if those who've gone beyond, are gently guiding us to other people. It sounds like that may have been the case for you.

I beleive everything happens for a reason.

Dev


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 Post subject: Loud and Clear Messages
PostPosted: April 21st, 2005, 2:46 pm 
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Joined: October 29th, 2003, 1:44 pm
Posts: 36
Location: Derry, NH
Hi all,
I haven't posted for a while, been busy with family illnesses and everday things, but I've been wanting to post the latest "messages" from my Aunt Helen for some time. Yet again, she is making her presense felt in some interesting ways.

My Mom is going through chemotherapy right now (just finished #6 out of #6 last week). She had surgery in Dec. to remove a cancerous lymph node that signalled the return of the ovarian cancer she'd beaten 11 years before. This was a tough thing to take, but not nearly as hard as the loss of her closest, most beloved sister, Helen (my Aunt. godmother and confidant) Feb 26, 2004.

At her #3 treatment, my Mom was seated next to a lovely older woman who was rather talkative. Even though my Mom wanted to sleep, she was drawn into a conversation with this woman to pass the time. In the course of the discussion, the woman reveals that her name is — Helen. Startling but a common enough name for those of that generation. Then she goes on to tell my Mom that she has LEUKEMIA — the very same disease that my Aunt died from. Both my Mom (and Dad, who is the biggest skeptic there is) were startled by the coincidence, and were sad at the reminder. They both spent a good deal of time with my Aunt and made it a point to take her with them to plays, trips, movies, etc.

21 days later my Mom goes in for treatment #4, and is again seated near an older woman who is also getting chemotherapy. She wasn't talking with my Mom, but the nurse, asking if she could make a phone call to alert "her sister Helen" that she would be longer than expected. The nurse didn't catch the name she said, and so the woman had to repeat it (as if my Mom hadn't heard it the first time) even louder, so the nurse could hear.

My Mom found herself comforted at this — and now has the distinct impression that my aunt is most definitely with her during this time. Dad still remains a complete skeptic when it comes to all things spiritual, but even he had to admit this was strange.

I'm now more convinced than ever that my aunt is aware of what my Mom is gong through, and is with her. I think she is sending loud and clear messages (ones you can't put down to coincidence or chance) to let my Mom know this. And maybe me too.

It makes me smile to think of the determination (and resourcefulness) she's using to do this. It helps to think of her this way, though I still miss her more than words can say.

Just recently, after these two incidents, my Mom had a very vivid dream that involved her sister. She said it was unlike any other dream she'd had, very vivid in color, and with a feeling of "reality" that she found impossible to ignore.

Here's the dream:


My Mom was seated in the back pew of a very large church, very ornate and beautiful. There were other people there, but seated far from her. The alter was far away, at the end of a long, long aisle, but one of the most beautiful she'd ever seen. It was quiet and peaceful. There were also several dark figures seated directly in front of her.

Someone sits down beside her, and my Mom turns to see it is my Aunt. Here's the conversation:

Mom: Oh Helen, you let your hair grow.

My Aunt: (sort of surprised by the observation) Oh yes, it is longer. I'll have to have that seen to.

Mom: I miss you

My Aunt: I know you do. But I don't want you to worry about me. I'm okay. (pauses for a second) I'm very okay.

At this point, one of the figures seated in front of them turned around, as if to listen. My Mom said "it" was dressed all in black, with a white face and no visible features. It frightened her (she said part of her fear was that this interuption would send her sister away), and she glared at it saying, "I'm not afraid of you. Turn around and stop bothering us. This doesn't convern you." (BTW, this is SO my Mom's style, I actually laughed when she told me this part.) The figure turned back around and my Mom went back to her conversation.

Mom: Are you with Mama?

My Aunt: (very frimly, smiling) Yes. Yes I am.

Mom: I miss you so much. I'm so sad without you.

My Aunt: I know you're sad, (sounds almost regretful) but I don't want you to be. I'm happy here.

Mom: You're really okay Helen?

My Aunt: Yes, I'm okay. I'm very okay.


What a wonderful gift — a comforting message not only for my Mom (who is struggling so hard right now) but for me as well. I think my Aunt was trying to tell us both something very important. And she succeeded.

Just wanted to share this with all of you.
Sue

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Portfolio @ http://www.Writing.Com/authors/smm110861
Blog @ http://smm110861.wordpress.com/


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